Wednesday, October 29, 2008
all of these happened earlier today. (=
the mister-was-in-the-same-bus-and-cab: shuimin!
the most powerful energy given: jikhim's fist. (punchpunch! heehee)
the most satisfactory thing: my poster presentation. (thanks!) it's finally over! whoohoo! can't wait for the rest of them to get over theirs too.
the most peculiar thing: stranger with hands up, like he was going to surrender to me. hah!
the highest and still sober moment: standing on a chair and, hmmm.
do i want to kill you. (=
23:31
Monday, October 27, 2008
if only you had seen the face, you'd feel me screaming inside. i could take the pain. i just don't want to end up in a hospital bed. when she exclaimed that i could die from it. maybe, oh kay. but i told you before. black shirt with silver tie.
if only i'm in a better form, i'd be spending some time away from the house. all i do now is stop and stare. yea. stop and stare. i was stunned the other night because, whoa. uber stunned. left hanging. meanwhile on other days, i would spend noon time with new people. it was weird but slowly, it gets alright, i think. at first, i couldn't believe myself either. almost happiness, but wasn't quite it. almost nothing close to that.
i found myself liking the sounds of broken records.
i, too, will play viva la vida!
dengdengdeng.
00:33
Monday, October 20, 2008
i dread going home lately. the smell of paint, an uninviting sign. how long before i stand alive and watch all disappearing, and finally gone.
just got home and went straight into ruth's room. that's when she seemed like she had something to boast about. and there it was, an empty closet. you have no idea what this is all turning into. my heart stays broken.
i've done some things yesterday that i still ask myself why. sunday, bloody sunday. how long must i sing this song.
sometimes, i say stupid things that end up hurting people. i'm sorry, i won't cry.
goodbye.
22:48
Monday, October 13, 2008
go to school. go to school. go to school. go to school. go to school. go to school. go to school. go to school. go to school. go to school. never give up. never give up. never give up. never give up. never give up. never give up. never give up.
psyche yourselves up, wokay.
the previous day was so depressing. sad for me. everyone inside the house but me, was cleaning and packing stuff. i refuse to do anything at all. making faces and falling back to sleep. what's left for me. i know i don't get to save this house anymore. and i shouldn't be running away.
so, don't go away
say that you stay
but say that you'll stay.
for all those words i sing, do you feel anything.
write me a letter. knock on my door.
09:39
Friday, October 10, 2008
if you had known and looked around, it's the second time today. what's with that. crappy. mixed, and all rushes back again. i just said it, you no longer care. really.
you keep me hanging on. so contagiously.
take another shot. some other day.
16:13
it's october already. woh, great. not.
one time, when i thought it's best to end everything quickly. just so i could fly away. stupid things that don't make sense. but only when other matters start falling in place again, it gets better, slowly. i don't wanna leave.
i think about samson whenever refrigerator hits my mind. cuzzie jasmine and i are in search of our baking oven. ain and i made through tuesday. suzanna, who's been thoughtful. shidah, the one that needs to catch up with us, please. oh, i miss bebe! theophilus is picking up the acoustic guitar. isaac is sharing many more tunes. seokuan wore a pretty bright smile. huayyin has been silly and a sweetie. chinho, gracious as always. maylwin, that chokes upon seeing me. corinne, a real sweetie too. many people with odd behaviours. sometimes, strangers smile. and when i have time to spare, i bother to wonder what's wrong with you. you don't care anymore. seriously, where are you? come back to the ground if you're getting high.
oh, poppy. strike two. he's over there whenever i ride the train home. listened how much he wanted to travel space and leave this crappy place. take a look around. well, it's turning blue here. why did the buildings turn blue? why those painters have overloaded blue paints? everything is changing way too fast. i detest. don't tell me to pack. please stop time. oh, house. house, house. i love this house! it's too jklahuehaunhdabdba. apparently, there are no words to describe.
wish i could stay long enough to spend another christmas, right here. where everyone stays behind too.
01:16
